The official car thread of RGRUP

[Flare]

Cars with the Most Sex Appeal Under 25K (http://www.roadandtrack.com/special_feature/cars-with-the-most-sex-appeal-under-25k)

Five new cars that are seriously seductive and won’t break the bank.

Pick your poison... I like the Genesis myself. I test drove one and it's fantastic. Hyundai is really impressing me these days.

2011 Chevrolet Camaro
http://www.roadandtrack.com/var/ezflow_site/storage_RT_NEW/storage/images/media/images/sf_camaro_lrg/2107861-2-eng-US/sf_camaro_lrg.jpg

2010 Hyundai Genesis Coupe
http://www.roadandtrack.com/var/ezflow_site/storage_RT_NEW/storage/images/media/images/sf_genesis_lrg/2107876-1-eng-US/sf_genesis_lrg.jpg

2011 Ford Mustang
http://www.roadandtrack.com/var/ezflow_site/storage_RT_NEW/storage/images/media/images/ford_mustang_embed/2109084-1-eng-US/ford_mustang_embed.jpg

2010 Volkswagen Golf GTI
http://www.roadandtrack.com/var/ezflow_site/storage_RT_NEW/storage/images/media/images/sf_vw-gti_lrg/2107921-2-eng-US/sf_vw-gti_lrg.jpg

2010 Kia Forte Koup
http://www.roadandtrack.com/var/ezflow_site/storage_RT_NEW/storage/images/media/images/kia-forte-koup_embed.jpg/2109069-1-eng-US/kia-forte-koup_embed.jpg.jpg

[teknohed]

http://www.allsportauto.com/photoautre/dmc/delorean/1981_delorean_dmc_03_m.jpg
DeLorean (http://shop.ebay.com/?_from=R40&_trksid=p3907.m570.l1313&_nkw=delorean&_sacat=See-All-Categories)

http://www.alfabb.com/bb/forums/attachments/other-italian-cars/60414d1173939259-fs-1979-ferrari-308-gtb-dsc00289.jpg
Ferrari 308 (http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/1982-FERRARI-308-GTSi-Low-Miles-/250677557025?pt=US_Cars_Trucks#ht_500wt_1182)

In contrast, here is my first car *sigh*:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e6/AMC_Eagle_wagon.jpg
AMC Eagle (http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/AMC-81-Eagle-AWD-2-dr-_W0QQcmdZViewItemQQitemZ140435931444QQptZUSQ5fCars Q5fTrucks#ht_500wt_1182)

All my friends would shout "The Eagle Has LANDED!" whenever I'd drive up. Although when I was driving this beast I still managed to get laid, which just goes to show that some high school girls have very low standards.

[Flare]

This was my first car... '68 Beige colored VW bug

A pass-on from dad

http://imgur.com/M5r5B.jpg

[teknohed]

My car all through college was a blue 72 super beatle! miss that thing.

[SubaruBrat]

My first: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/archive/f/fd/20080201113942%211976_Toyota_Corolla.jpg
(mine was black, this is not my car)




My second: http://www.detomaso.nu/pantera_gt5_bild1.jpg
(Mine was yellow, this is not my car, I have a few photos of it somewhere I should find)

The Pantera was brilliant, it was essentially a Countach clone with a 351 Ford engine, same HP output as an exotic V12 without the nightmare maintenance and reliability issues. I put a fair amount of work into mine, supercharger, 8 into 4 straightpipe exhaust, etc. I miss that car.

My favorite: http://www.subarubrat.com/PICS/dirtpile13.jpg
(this is a photo of mine)

Unfortunatly Subaru used very poor quality metal and the BRATs are literally falling apart no matter what you do. I had to put mine down last year, I really planned on owning it for life. It had zero rust after I finished the build in 02 and by 09 it had terminal rust.

Another favorite Subaru I owned: http://carphotos.cardomain.com/ride_images/1/1114/1141/2783070009_large.jpg
(not mine either, but same year)

I owned a white one in Germany, I swapped in the EG33 engine from the SVX and two VF22 turbos, it was an absolute monster. I loved hitting the on ramps on the autobahn and watching a frustrated Porsche owner in the rear view as the Subaru logo on my trunk just ran away and he was unable to even think of keeping up. My evil EX head on crashed it and had the nerve to live.

[Turbo2Xs]

Oh my... that Pantera is awesome! What happened to it?

[SubaruBrat]

I sold it and bought an 86 BRAT, this would have been 88 or 89. I also owned another XT6 in 2001, I put an Allison A250 turbine engine into it and had it badged as an XT747. I had well under 10k into it and was offered a great deal more that that a few months later at a car show. It was a cool project but really not very practical even by my standards, but it was really really cool to start it up with unsuspecting people around.

Oh, funny thing about that sub 25k Camaro, it is the V6 not the SS with the LS3 Corvette engine.

[Turbo2Xs]

Ah, I see but sheesh, what a looker that thing was and, apparently it it even had "doors that buzz when ... open" :J

As for the Camaros tho, I pass at least 35 a day around here. And Mustangs... don't get me started!

What makes this particularly egregious is that 80% of them are fitted with ridiculously over-sized, heavy ass rims that completely destroys the cars suspension geometry, handling etc but hey... they LOOK cool :rolleyes:

[SubaruBrat]

We have a 2SS Camaro and love it, they let the car mature so it still has a great deal of "muscle car" to it but also is very comfortable, it really feels more like a European sports coupe than your traditional American car. It is bone stock other than a magnacharger supercharger kit, the wife was tired of commuting to work in track cars and wanted something with heated leather seats and a stock exhaust so this was our comprimise.

[Leathco]

I'm going a different route here....my 1996 Jeep Grand Cherokee.

http://www.governmentauctions.org/uploaded_images/jeep3-718781.jpg
Theres a good pic of one just like mine.

Why does this thing have sex appeal? Lets start with just a nice 318 motor, all wheel drive as your standard driving mode, and the ability to pull and haul more or less anything needed.

On top of all that, the back seat can be taken out for more room. Put some blankets back there for a comfy spot with plenty of room to work with. Dark tinted windows (on mine) are always a plus as well.

Why get laid in the back of a cramped DeLorean (which actually I'd love to own a DeLorean) when you can have fun in the Jeep and have plenty of room for any position you can come up with? Just be careful guys not to get reamed on the stickshift!

[teknohed]

My DAd has driven a long line of Cherokee's all the way back to our 81 Jeep Wagoneer. They are great for towing boats. Comfortable and relatively reliable. His 99 Grand Cherokee has almost 300k miles and is still towing his boat to teh lake every weekend. My Dad has taken it so far as to have a Piper Cherokee 180, but I think that was a happy accident.

[SubaruBrat]

We got our son a Jeep Wranger, they are simple, slow, safe, and not socially ostracizing but boy do they hold their value compared to a cherokee. You can find a loaded grand cherokee that originally sold for nearly twice as much as the Wrangler of the same year and they are less expensive than the Wrangler.

[Turbo2Xs]

Well, since he started it: anyone want to buy this?

http://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd48/Turbo2Xs/CIMG1018-3.jpg

Off to Alaska for a few years and might be better served with a snowmobile or, praytell, a Jeep. :D

[Turbo2Xs]

It is bone stock other than a magnacharger supercharger kit

So few of us that can use 'bone stock' and supercharger in the same sentence! :DKB

[SubaruBrat]

I prefer to think of naturally aspirated cars as "some assembly required".

[Turbo2Xs]

And I tend to agree with you on that point... so, any thoughts on a fun vehicle that would be functional in AK?

[SubaruBrat]

Bowler Wildcat

[Flare]

Turbo, how much? And will you deliver it to Arkansas.

I actually need a car myself.

[teknohed]

Alaskan transportation suggestion: Piper Cub with some Ski-Gear.

[SubaruBrat]

Tek has a point, you could have plenty of time to build a Kitfox, they fly off skis and wheels, a whole new world of fun. And up there you learn real man's flying, taildragger on short and soft field.

http://www.kitfoxaircraft.com/ (http://www.kitfoxaircraft.com/)


Here is that Wildcat: <object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/dLvlfAyduvA&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/dLvlfAyduvA&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

[Turbo2Xs]

Turbo, how much? And will you deliver it to Arkansas.

I actually need a car myself.
Currently it appears to be worth $18-20K which seems a bit low for the mileage ('06 w/30K) and given that it has pretty much all the options other than nav and rear active steer... as for delivery, you come pick it up and I'll throw in a few hours on my 'trashcade' and call it Turbopalozza :D


Alaskan transportation suggestion: Piper Cub with some Ski-Gear.

Nice but I don't have a pilots license and I doubt that is in my price range lol


Here is that Wildcat: <object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/dLvlfAyduvA&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/dLvlfAyduvA&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

Yeah, after you made the suggestion I looked it up, including that video... let me just say, I'm not a truck guy but I want that sucker! Sadly, it seems it would be rather hard to find... :(

[alyinsanfran]

http://img697.imageshack.us/img697/8884/themazd.jpg

The better half bought this in late '92 as they were announced in the US. We just put (another) new engine it it and had it resprayed. Stupidly fun to drive. Smoooooth, midrange that makes the lightness fun, tight steering and suspension. Very expensive to keep running properly though.

She yearns for an Exige if we ever stack it. Which considering how I drive, may come sooner than later. As an ex-motorcycle roadracer it's tough to find something on 4 wheels that scratches the itch!

[SubaruBrat]

The Elise/Exige is something that I describe to people as a sport bike you sit in, I did the BWR supercharger, added and air to water intercooler, head/cam, and Von Hepp exhaust. It is maniacal. Gtek is telling me 0-60 in 3.5 sec. Spedo is easy to bury. This is ours before we did the upgrades. I must upload a photo of it with the body off doing the engine, it is artwork.

http://www.subarubrat.com/misc/lotus2.jpg

[alyinsanfran]

Beautiful. Form following function always produces true beauty. Do you take it to your local track? That would be VIR wouldn't it?

[Edwards80]

If I can be bold and assume less than £25k instead of $ then my old mans P4 Ferrari Replica may qualify :) Chevy V8 engine with an exhaust system he hand made himself. It's lighter + faster than the original and doesn't have a £10mil price tag! Not that I would sniff at the original.

Only downside is that you can't drive it through Italy. Ferrari have found and destroyed replica's in the past :(

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3282/2960539871_6c75fae4e4.jpg

The flag is in the background by the way, the photo just makes us look over patriotic :S

[SubaruBrat]

Found some photos, this is the stage I supercharger which I later pulled and put in an air to water IC and some other upgrades. But it looks the same other than two pipes.

http://www.retrogamingroundup.com/images/Scott/IMG_1196.JPG

Here is the car last Halloween, we loaded up my neighbor in his costume and drove around town.

http://www.retrogamingroundup.com/images/Scott/IMG_1134.JPG


Here is the back half of the shell sitting the house.

http://www.retrogamingroundup.com/images/Scott/IMG_1206.JPG

And here is the rear with the body removed, the supercharger is on the engine, I love how they used bonded aluminum and magnesium to create simplistic yet impossibly stiff and light structure.

http://www.retrogamingroundup.com/images/Scott/IMG_1220.JPG


And yeah, not under 25k.....

[teknohed]

All arcade rooms should come with Tabby cats and car body parts strewn about.

[SubaruBrat]

Actually that is Tokyo, the no good snooty breed cat, the other two we have are "tabbies" but are the cool cats. Pchan is the really cool one, I declared him to be his own breed, the North American Singe Tail, he sits down when I am soldering and drapes his tail over the iron, also has hopped onto the oven door a few times.

[Flare]

Currently it appears to be worth $18-20K which seems a bit low for the mileage ('06 w/30K) and given that it has pretty much all the options other than nav and rear active steer... as for delivery, you come pick it up and I'll throw in a few hours on my 'trashcade' and call it Turbopalozza :DOh my... I had no idea those cars were *that* expensive. That's way more than my budget. Sorry about that :).

[SubaruBrat]

Flare, if you care about performance, and want something cheap there are two lesser known options for around 5 and 10k. These need some work but it is all bolt on stuff. For around 10k you can build what is called the poor man's Cobra. You buy a Mazda Miata in good shape with a failed or failing motor, the V8 Miata conversion kit, and a Ford 5ltr engine (from the 5.0 Mustang) plus a few other bits and tire/wheel upgrades. The car only gets 200lbs heavier, the balance is not ruined, and you get a car that is just insanity. Option 2 is to pick up a late 90's or early 2000s Honda Civic hatch with a bad motor which will be crazy cheap, pull an Integra R motor which is also cheap now, and a used turbo kit that has also gotten very cheap. You'll get mid-cost Porsche performance for nothing, and they respond well to suspension upgrades as well. Once built both are reliable as daily drivers.

[Flare]

My budget is actually pretty low (between 3K and 4K) and I'm looking for a commuter car, really. Also I know nothing about car mechanics so I wouldn't know what to do with those parts :)

[Turbo2Xs]

My budget is actually pretty low (between 3K and 4K) and I'm looking for a commuter car, really. Also I know nothing about car mechanics so I wouldn't know what to do with those parts :)

lol. So you figured you could not only snag my G for that price but I'd DELIVER it too?!

Flare, Flare Flare... maybe in Mexico you could get a deal like that! :BONK:

Also, as a commuter car, I doubt you'd be all that thrilled by the 15mpg on premium fuel! :D

[Flare]

lol. So you figured you could not only snag my G for that price but I'd DELIVER it too?!

Flare, Flare Flare... maybe in Mexico you could get a deal like that! :BONK:

Also, as a commuter car, I doubt you'd be all that thrilled by the 15mpg on premium fuel! :D
Not at all dude. I figured my budget could also serve as down payment for a pre-owned vehicle, but in a way that my monthly payments wouldn't be more than $100 month. I just had no idea that vehicle was that expensive!

The "will you deliver" part was just a joke of course.

[teknohed]

http://www.specialized.com/OA_MEDIA/2007/bikes/TRI_SW_Dbl_Carbon_w_Red.jpg

Here's what I've been saving up for (http://www.specialized.com/zz/en/bc/SBCBkModel.jsp?spid=22305&menuItemId=0). My job consists of sitting behind a computer for 8-10 hours. Figure it wouldn't hurt to get a little excercise fresh air on my way to and from. Unfortunately, this is not as sexy as a sports car, except maybe to these chicks:

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_1Zb7K43b1D4/S36XgO5sIPI/AAAAAAAAFAQ/HYpJRoEAQYI/s1600/MikeGiantModernSF.jpg

Come to think of it I think we saw some of these ladies at Trop this year.

[Flare]

I bought a used TREK bike for a $100. Priced new at around $1000.

Serves me right for my semi-daily exercise sessions here in town :)

[meu2]

If economy is of concern perhaps you should take my approach:

http://lh6.ggpht.com/_1wioNshcL2k/TGUK00MN-VI/AAAAAAAAABI/JVqgj3ZsOlw/s512/Commuter%202800.jpg

It might not be the sexiest machine around or the most powerful since its MAN 400hp engine tops out at 120 km/h, but it seats more than a hundred people. Large enough for even the biggest family.

[Flare]

I love this license plate. Though I don't think you could get away with it for too long.

http://a.imageshack.us/img835/4856/plate.jpg

[Flare]

Dashcam Captures Scary 100 MPH Car Crash (Video) (http://www.break.com/index/dashcam-captures-100-mph-car-crash)

A car tears down the middle of a highway and disintegrates on impact with the underpass.

[miner2049er]

I bet that stings a little.

[Flare]

Audi unveils the ultimate R8: The Audi R8 GT (http://digg.com/story/r/audi_unveils_the_ultimate_r8_the_audi_r8_gt)

Marking the ultimate in R8 performance, Audi today used the Paris Motor Show to unveil its track-ready R8 GT. 560 horsepower, 398 lb-ft of torque, 200 pounds lighter than the standard R8, and a top speed of 198.84 mph. And it can be yours for only €193,000.

[seanyboyuk]

If i had 25k i would buy a skoda octavia vrs. Top notch build quality (Volkswagen under the bonnet) Cheaper than any equivalent motor, good economy (45-50mpg diesel models), great family car and to top it off impressive performance.

[SubaruBrat]

Did you see Jeremy Clarkson's review of the Octavia vrs? It is amazing Clarkson, in that he can do two pages and the car is a footnote. I love his work.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/driving/jeremy_clarkson/article1137479.ece

[seanyboyuk]

nope but i have now. interesting read! i hope to own one 1 day. im driving a 207 sport 1.6hdi at the mo. its a nice drive, 64mpg and quite refined for peugeot, zero wind noise at 90mph!

[Flare]

Tesla Recalls 439 Roadster EVs for Short in Electrical System (http://digg.com/story/r/tesla_recalls_439_roadster_evs_for_short_in_electr ical_system)

Tesla Motors has issued a voluntary recall for certain Roadster models.

[Flare]

This Car Uses Less Gas Than Any Other Fossil Fuel Powered Car (video) (http://digg.com/story/r/this_car_uses_less_gas_than_any_other_fossil_fuel_ powered_car_video)

In September, the California Center for Sustainable Energy revealed that its Prius PHV returned a much more remarkable 83 mpg. Watch the Fully Charged show drive the plugin-in Prius.

[Flare]

Five Luxury Vehicles With Plummeting Prices (http://www.thecarconnection.com/marty-blog/1050410_five-luxury-vehicles-with-plummeting-prices)

[SubaruBrat]

In my opinion the Caddy CTS-V is one of the best deals out there. Buy 2 years old for half price and enjoy. The same with the Lotus Elise and Exige.

If nothing else I say this, why buy today's mediocre when you can buy a 2 or 3 year old dream car for the same price?

[Flare]

Top 10 Cars to Get Laid In (http://digg.com/story/r/top_10_cars_to_get_laid_in)

Keep in mind that it DOES NOT say, “Top 10 Cars That Will Get You Laid”, it says, “Top 10 Cars to Get Laid In” – there is a very big difference here.

[Dhalamar]

I drive a 1997 Honda Civic with almost 262,000 miles on it as of this writing. It cost me $1,200 ... plus an alignment, new brakes and 2 new tires (when buying a used car from a dealer, those are my considerations. Safety first. Always.)

It gets 41MPG in town when I drive it right. I deliver papers, so consider all the starts and stops that car goes through. :)

And it has a picture of a fairy in the back window that's mostly purple, so I know it was either a woman or a gay man driving the thing before me. And it has glasspacks on it, so it SOUNDS a LOT meaner than it actually is. But hey, it frees up some of that restricted horsepower and adds a LITTLE bit to the gas mileage, and, most importantly, it isn't leaking exhaust fumes into the car.

BUT ... I am able to hit 60MPH in just over 5 seconds in it ... but it felt like I was going to tear the clutch out of the car doing it, so I've only done it once. No reason to do it again since my kid and my job counts on me having a clean driving record. :P

But it was golden seeing the fucking kid in the Mustang GT practically shit himself when I blew him away in my little 4 cylinder front wheel drive dink-mobile. :D

I don't know about the "sex appeal" but I like my car. Mostly for the gas mileage since it's mostly a "utility vehicle". I get almost what a Prius can get (with normal driving, barring any skills) for a fraction of the price.

Hell yeah. :P

A car I had before this one ... you've gotta consider my gas mileage needs here since I drive 80 miles a day Monday through Friday of an extreme form of in town driving ... a 1994 Ford Aspire (if you don't know what it is ... think Geo Metro or Ford Festiva). When I got it, the ONLY thing that was wrong with it mechanically is that it needed new brakes and tires. That's it.

Physically, the paint was faded almost to a pink color (it's supposed to be a deep red or something) and the guy who had it hauled landscaping around in it for his job and he didn't care. So the inside was a disaster. 6 hours of cleaning up resolved the inside and made it look great. Some of that stuff that restores paint color or whatever returned the color to about 80% of what it SHOULD HAVE been, with KILLER gas mileage, especially with a 5 speed transmission helping it along.

I paid EXACTLY $100 for that car because the owner knew my mom and he just wanted to be rid of it. :)

It finally crapped out on me. But I got my money's worth. :) That sucker lasted WELL over 800,000 miles with normal maintenance (oil changes mostly).

[Flare]

Top 10 Most and Least Expensive Cars to Insure (http://www.leftlanenews.com/acura-zdx-tops-list-of-most-expensive-cars-to-insure.html)

While sports cars and off road-oriented SUVs might seem like they should be the most expensive new cars to insure, a recent report by an insurance comparison website suggests otherwise.

[SubaruBrat]

MUWAHHAHHAAA *Wrings hands in an evil fashion"

I am pulling out my BWR supercharger on my Elise and going to the new BOE. I am also going to replace the M62 with a TVR or similar. Gotta upgrade the clutch too for the increased HP, and as long as I have the whole car apart I am going to go to a 7.5Lb flywheel. What sucks about doing this sort of work is that you have to pull the whole back end bodywork off the car, until now. These guys are making a clam hinge so that it swings up and you can get to everything.

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f172/105149d1229211498-boe-clam-hinges-sale-25.jpg

Can't wait for them to ship, look at that thing it is art.

http://www.boefabrication.com/images/uploads/Full1TVS-web1.jpg

[Flare]

Are you saying you are getting a TVR vehicle? Not sure what an "M62" is.

I remember the TVR Tuscan from the John Travolta movie Swordfish. Nice ride.

http://moviecrackhouse.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/swordfish-tvr.jpg

[SubaruBrat]

As much as I love TVRs, that wasn't what I was referring to. That is a model of supercharger, I currently have an M62 and am going to a better model, one of which I am considering is a TVR, nothing to do with the TVR car though.

[SubaruBrat]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AdcoVurVY30&feature=player_embedded

[miner2049er]

I don't believe that's how Chevrolet put my engine together. I think there were more blind people involved.

One of them is possibly still in there.

[Flare]

One of them is possibly still in there.
I know all about putting people in cars...

http://i.imgur.com/ltggn.jpg

[SubaruBrat]

There are three more in that briefcase on the seat.

[SubaruBrat]

My clam hinge kit arrived the other day and I installed it this weekend. I cannot believe that the car did not come this way. Normally access to the engine was either reaching over 2ft of body work and into a small engine cover, or you had to bite the bullet and remove the rear body all together. All you have to do now is remove a few latches and it flips up in the air and you have access to everything.

http://www.gamegavel.com/forum/www.retrogamingroundup.com/images/Scott/CLAM.jpg

[bill_loguidice]

I got myself a 2011 Ford Fiesta SES last week (traded down from an '09 Hyundai Sonata). For me, it's a pretty radical departure from what I've had in the past, particularly in regards to color. Here's a photo, though this is someone else's car:
http://media.dealerskins.com/carspecs2002/Photos/JATOCOLOR400/FORD%5CFIESTA%5C2011%5C5HANQ.jpg

[miner2049er]

I am about to set my own car on fire, but I just bought my eldest daughter one of these.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FoXyvaPSnVk/SvxAG_jBTOI/AAAAAAACPc8/pzkXG_mL1vo/s800/Toyota-Aygo-Platinum-0.jpg

It's not as bad as it looks and it makes an ideal first car.

[SubaruBrat]

What is your car up to?

[miner2049er]

It seems the electrical system was commissioned by idiots and fitted by members of the gibbon family.

Every trip I make in it I have warning lights on the dash, and when they come on I get reduced throttle. That is a persistent problem I have had on and off for 3 years. Apparently they mean that my brakes are failing, the stability system has failed and I will be unable to select descent mode were I to need it.

My gearbox recently decided to get halfway through every journey then stick in 4th, unless I switched to manual when it would give me 2nd as well.

I recently had to clean out my fuel system with a potent mix of injector cleaner and a little diesel.

The parking sensors have a meeting every time I hit reverse and come to a decision on whether or not to work at all or whether to play some kind of monotone tune as I use the old fashioned method of deciding whether or not I am about to hit something.

My engine warning light has a regular shift pattern and tends to do 5 days on and 11 days off.

I have spoken nicely to Chevrolet, my wife has spoken nicely to Chevrolet, I have threatened to drag the useless reps through the phone and feed them to dangerous animals but they are the worst company I have ever had to deal with. I would never buy a Chevrolet ever again.

I hope the dealer has the windows open on Thursday because it will save them having to replace them when I drive into reception and park on the Service Desk.

[SubaruBrat]

I have always followed the philosophy in general of pick the model not the manufacturer. I have a Camaro 2SS that has performed perfectly, as did the Vette I owned, those are good Chevys. I had a Trailblazer and an Impala as loaners when the Camaro was in for routine service and lets say I was not impressed. Most manufacturers have great and not so great models. The good models have the effect of masking the real problem of how service is handled when a problem is encountered. There really is not allot of difference between asian/EU/US manufacturers anymore these days when it comes to basic transportation cars. The problem is pretty much all of those companies are loath to replace the big parts that fail. In your car's case it is entering into limp home mode, sort of a safe mode to minimize damage but mostly to force you to bring the car in for service. Pretty much all modern ECUs have a limp mode of some kind. Rather than keep screwing around with fault isolation (which they have seemingly proven incapable of) they should replace the harness, accelerometers/wheel speed/ sensors, and replace the ECU. Then they can send the whole package back to corporate to figure out what is good and what isn't on their time. Of course they won't do that in most cases.

Did they do a dump of the codes that are causing the CEL? Do you have a OBDII reader? Those codes are often mistaken as telling you what part to replace every time, they usually don't, but they paint the picture of what the system is doing.

Local service departments are always looking to minimize their exposure to loss because corporate is very serious about not paying for unapproved work. In general the service manager is utterly incapable of doing anything above the bare minimum. The real goal is to dig into their corporate level offices and have them push the approval to the dealership to do the big work, and as you found the reps are there as a firewall to prevent you from dealing with the real decision makers. These people are not impossible to get contact info for with enough looking and social engineering.

[miner2049er]

Every time it goes in (to an approved Chevy dealer) they hook it up to their Chevy computer and the history of codes tells them that the harness is bad and the accelerator potentiometer is bad. Both have been replaced.

They have traced the wiring further back and found broken wires and fixed them. It still tells them the harness is bad and the accelerator potentiometer is bad.

Last time I was in I spoke in no uncertain terms to the manager who explained to me the problem he was having in dealing with Chevrolet. They are no help to him and he basically has to do this work for free as I have paid for both those parts to be replaced in the past and still have the problem.

There used to be a Chevy dealer in my own town but they dropped Chevy support as they too found them such a bind to deal with. I agree with you for the most part, but I would not give Chevrolet another penny of my kids inheritance for one of their cars, good or bad.

[SubaruBrat]

Depending on the design, there are typically multiple pots in the DBW module at the pedal, it calculates using all of them (usually 3) so that if one or more failed your still safe. If their finding wires after the portion of the harness that they replaced then it sounds like the replaced a partial segment. And the thing in common with all of this is the ECU, if the ECU is sampling its inputs wrong then it could be reporting good hardware as bad constantly or at random, as could a broken or intermittent harness problem, that is why I think it all needs to go. I should also mention that some units use PCM, resolvers, etc. not just pots. The end result is usually a voltage range indicating pedal position. The ECU must accurately read this output.

And these sorts of problems are how manufacturers enter and leave markets. If they can't support the sales with service, or more accurately import models that reveal the weaknesses in service, then they might just loose that market. Allot of examples come to mind: Opel and Fiat in America for starters. Subaru in the early 90s after they killed off the models customers wanted and pushed junk, and now over here Lotus is actually getting into the act. They have decided to go heavily up-brand and are pulling out of dealerships that sold "highline" vehicles such as Porsche, Hummer, and Vettes, sort of like Crisswell in Maryland and concentrating on strictly exotic dealers. What that meant is that they shut down service and parts availability for most of the central East coast among other areas. If I needed warranty service I would be looking at a 3 hour drive or tow to the nearest dealer where it used to be 45 min. If this was my daily driver that had 3 years of warranty time left it would be a pretty bad situation and I would not be happy. So stick it too them on this but don't be afraid to pick up a Z06 for a track car after the kids are through school.

[SubaruBrat]

UK, and other F1 fans, here is a neat article on the banning of ground effects in F1 http://www.f1fanatic.co.uk/2007/06/07/banned-ground-effects/ The whole article series of banned features can be seen here, good reading http://www.f1fanatic.co.uk/category/regular-features/banned/

[miner2049er]

The history of how the mechanics try to interpret the rules and come up with ways to bend them is amazing.

There is a fine line between innovation and cheating.

[SubaruBrat]

And then there are the blatant cheats, like Toyota when they pulled their big cheat in rally racing; http://homepage.virgin.net/shalco.com/tte_ban.htm

[SubaruBrat]

Great GoogelyMoogely, I have installed the new supercharger kit in the Lotus. This thing is just insane now, more HP/Lb than a Ferrari F40. Pics to follow,

[SubaruBrat]

I swear I will post pics one day.


For now enjoy this, and lets face it, you need to watch this alone and deal with what might arise;


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eidtc55ZqoU

And should the forum be a problem: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eidtc55ZqoU

[miner2049er]

That's a great film made by a guy called Claude Le Louche.

I found it a few years ago after searching for a long time (God bless youtube).

The film was genuinely done early one Paris morning without closing any streets and running the risk of arrest etc, but was filmed using a Mercedes and has Ferrari sounds dubbed on it.

[miner2049er]

Here's an article with a pic of the rig used.

http://zerofilter.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8345264ac69e2010536d40251970c-800wi

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_EWY1PJsPzBA/SwlAxhMiM0I/AAAAAAAAAek/ca-5UWwF19E/s1600/lelouch-rendezvous-mercedes1.jpg

[omega_supreme]

I had a debate about this just earlier this year with a couple of co-workers. Clearly one had no taste in automobiles, as one of them said a Pontiac Bonneville's and Cutlas Supreme's were the smexiest... has about as good a taste in cars as he has in woman. And the other co-worker swore up and down that anything made by Saab would have woman flinging themselves at your car... I call that vehicular manslaughter myself. Now one might think these indivuduals were both totally nuts, but one of them actually was driving a Pontiac Bonneville (guess which one) and the other lemented the fact that he didn't own a car. And this little tale has truly been needless conjecture, but I felt like typing it.

So then, late last year I bought my first car. And it is two tons of smexy, gas guzzling, tail gate smogging, anti-eco friendly, marvel of English engineering. Purrs like a kitten when idle, roars like a great cat when you step on the pedal.

Luckily, I came across one of these beauties in fantastic condition for just under three grand:
http://www.automobile-catalog.com/pict_sm/jaguar/xj122lu74.jpg

That is a 1974 Jaguar XJ 12 L. Mine is red (original paint) and has every options package except for fog lights. It did need some mechanical maintenence when I got it, so all in all it's actually cost me about six thousand. Power steering system has a leak, but otherwise is a great ride. Took it up to about 110 MPH on the interstate one night back in February, purely by mistake of course, and it simply roared like the great cat it is.

Ah, but alas, it is a cat and I was having trouble minding it whilst it was left alone. Several gas stations pounced upon later I found it necessary to buy a second vehicle just for the sake of not feeling robbed every time fuel was needed. So I bought a 1988 Mercedes Benz 300E for the sake of not spending all of my pay checks at the gas stations... now I spend them all on repairs for the Mercedes. <sigh>

[Dhalamar]

I don't care if my car is sexy. Given the job that I do, I need reliability and gas mileage, and considering I paid $1,600 for this car it's lived up to that so far and has been worth every penny considering it has a bad O2 sensor (don't know if I spelled that right. I'm not a car guy) that causes it to idle a little funky and some cosmetic problems. :)

http://wastedseconds.com/images/kthx.jpg

http://wastedseconds.com/images/civic.jpg

Mine's obviously the white one.

[SubaruBrat]

@ Omega - That Jag is brilliant, I have always wanted to swap one of those 12's into a 280z or something similar.

Here are some pics of the mods I did, and some other cars from the most recent Cars and Coffee gathering, one of the local guys is kind enough to take some great pics and post them.

These pics show what my engine compartment now looks like:

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165724d1304800662-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130580.jpg

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165725d1304800662-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130579.jpg


http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165726d1304800662-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130577.jpg



http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165702d1304795986-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130575.jpg

[SubaruBrat]

Here are some of other cars that showed up for the meet. The Cars and Coffee happens every Saturday morning and some great cars turn up.

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165727d1304800662-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1120796-2.jpg

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165230d1304177651-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130259.jpg

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165234d1304178252-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130209.jpg

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165238d1304178252-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130295.jpg

[SubaruBrat]

More:

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165703d1304795986-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130573.jpg

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165704d1304795986-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130503.jpg


http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165708d1304796980-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130537.jpg


I think that the Saab Sonnet is the only good looking Saab ever made, and it does look great!

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165709d1304796980-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130536.jpg

[SubaruBrat]

And more:


http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165710d1304796980-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130514.jpg

It should be required that this car emits colored bubbles from the exhaust pipe:

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/165711d1304797742-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1130524.jpg

I had a 77' Pantera, looked pretty much like this one, they never seem to age;

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/163037d1300571426-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1120408.jpg

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/163345d1301151918-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1120503.jpg

[SubaruBrat]

Still more:

http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/163350d1301153677-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1120553.jpg


http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/163352d1301153677-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1120526.jpg


http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/163688d1301757451-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1120653.jpg


http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f113/164094d1302362867-2011-c-c-great-falls-va-katies-p1120693.jpg

[Blackzc]

Cars and coffee would be awesome.

I dont know if this is sexy or not but its a fun car to drive and handles, RWD/LSD also. Kinda sexy IMO.
http://i53.tinypic.com/21cw2tc.jpg

The other day a guy in a vette pulled up next to me and yelled, nice bitch car!! Then sped away. I was like (socal) WTF?! (socal). Its for sure a love it or hate it car. Uninformed base vette owners aside they are a capable car. But if all goes well this fall i will be selling the miata and getting an S2K. Dream car...(sigh)

[SubaruBrat]

He's lucky that you didn't have the V8 conversion or the next stop light conversation might have been very different. If you want a monster think about doing the conversion kit. The 5.0ltr Ford V8 only adds 200 Lbs or so to the cars weight and does not ruin that fine roadster balance that the Miata has. If you go heavy (supercharged), fatter tires and a goos suspension it turns into a poor man's AC Cobra.

[SubaruBrat]

I headed out to the cars and coffee in great lakes and as I was coming in on the parkway I was a few miles out when I ran into a fellow in a F355GTS and we mixed it up a bit. The sound of the two cars mixing as we made our way to the show was just amazing. If any of you guys are in the DC area PM me and well meet up at the show, it is something you have to see to believe.

[Flare]

Is this the end of in-car CD players?

Ford scraps 'old' technology for digital entertainment (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2019168/Ford-scraps-CD-players-digital-entertainment.html#ixzz1TPBDo9n4)

[miner2049er]

I hope so. They jump too much, even the good ones.

A good dogging session will completely ruin a Disc.

[tcv]

A good dogging session will completely ruin a Disc.

I was hoping that, since there's not so much dogging here in the States, can you post some dogging videos?

[miner2049er]

I was hoping that, since there's not so much dogging here in the States, can you post some dogging videos?

No, but I guess if you were of a mind to you could Google "Rachel" and "Dogging".

[tcv]

Is this going to be anything searching Google for the story about the boy sticking his finger in the dyke?

[random_dave]

Was thinking my car is quite nice, and was well under 25k, and then i remembered that I've repressed all the memories of the repair bills, which is why it seems so cheap ;-)
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-teyXrpjgsZw/Tl-plsdPnLI/AAAAAAAAAPM/GY09WXZ9GUs/s800/5575_129264072525_587492525_3321772_3993231_n.jpg

i like the nuggets of car talk on the show btw, especially when it requires UK to explain dogging, that was fantastic

[SubaruBrat]

So wrong.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IiBvWGDCJ14&feature=player_embedded

[Turbo2Xs]

Finally! A practical use for those Smart cars!

In other news, keeping with the thread topic, my car is now under $25k and it's still damn sexy. And a garage queen, sadly.

[Clytor]

Mang, this reminds me of the guy that moved into warehouse space a few doors down from the operator I used to work for. I pulled into work one day and I saw one of those 80's Lambo SUV things parked in the alley. Upon further inspection, a 60's Ferrari as well. I went over and talked to the car transport guy. He said he was "dropping a couple off and picking a couple up". A few minutes later the owner showed up and open the roll up door to the garage. HOLY SHIT! It was filled with Lambos and Ferraris! Got to know him a little bit while I worked over there. He offered to take me for a ride in the F-40. Bummed I never got to take him up on it.

[SubaruBrat]

Here are some cars WAY under 25k; The top ten cheap cars in the USA. Funny thing is, while they are not much for performance they are quality vehicles for the price. Arguing from a reliability standpoint only, it is pretty hard to buy a junk car anymore.

http://www.autoguide.com/auto-news/2011/10/top-10-cheapest-new-cars-you-can-buy.html/10

[Dhalamar]

http://youtu.be/ALKTM7OzdMQ

[SubaruBrat]

http://www.motoringexposure.com/11098/the-top-10-high-end-douchebag-cars

[SubaruBrat]

Looked at a car today, working on the right offer....

[SubaruBrat]

Well here it is, my Ferrari 355F1 I just bought, these are shots the dealer took, the car is on a transport now being shipped to me. Ill post some more pics once it arrives.

http://retrogamingroundup.com/images/3551.jpg

http://retrogamingroundup.com/images/3552.jpg


http://retrogamingroundup.com/images/3553.jpg

[random_dave]

Freaking shnit, nice colo(u)r! is it iridescant or just the light blue/silver metallic (azzuro california maybe)?

i get to pick my baby back up tomorrow, with new rear springs and rear brakes, which means I think every item that can wear out has been replaced at least once on it, so it's pretty much just the bodywork and engine block that is original ;-)

[SubaruBrat]

It is Titanium Grigiot, a combination of titanium, blue, and silver. I already have upgrades on the way. I am doing a carbon fiber interior and some engine work.

-@Dave, pics my good man!

[Nurmix]

It is Titanium Grigiot, a combination of titanium, blue, and silver. I already have upgrades on the way. I am doing a carbon fiber interior and some engine work.

Sweetness! Why don't you drive that bad boy to CGE 2012 so we can cruise the strip in style?

Just don't let anyone else drive it, or they might end up looking like this douche bag in the 4th car...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pjdbRsE1vhM&feature=related

[chalksalad]

Cars are not my thing but I'm pretty sure we can all enjoy this.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGKjFkeME9Q&

[random_dave]

-@Dave, pics my good man!

This is on a day when it was clean enough to show it's "real" blue colour, the Azzurro Nuvola Iridescent has a way of telling you that it needs a wash, it turns a greeny gold colour (which is it's usual colour)
A nice 'future classic' but pales in comparison to the 355 (although may be more practical as an every day drive)
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-teyXrpjgsZw/Tl-plsdPnLI/AAAAAAAAAPM/GY09WXZ9GUs/s800/5575_129264072525_587492525_3321772_3993231_n.jpg

[SubaruBrat]

Is it just me, or do those wheels really resemble the Countach wheels with the bold circles? What brand are those?

[miner2049er]

That picture is well framed, I can't see any trace of the tow truck.

[random_dave]

@Scott, They are the 17" Teledials that come with the Aero pack, they are Alfa branded, but i don't recall anyone saying who actually made them. When i first saw the 156 come out with a 16" version they always reminded me of my scalextric XR3i rally cars http://www.jacksonsmodels.co.uk/images/_lib/corgi-va11003-ford-escort-mkiii-xr3i-dorset-police-143-scale-3008722-0-1258479297000.jpg

@UK (touch wood) it's never had the need for a tow truck yet, it's worn out plenty of (Fiat Tipo, ffs!) wishbones and dampers and it's had the oil cooler and the radiator rust to pieces, but bless it it soldiered on pretty well even after pumping all of it's oil out of the engine.
I think the most annyoying 'breakdown' was when it was in for it's last MOT, and they hit the brakes to test the fronts and both sides popped the flexies and pissed brake fluid all over their nice clean test bay ;)
Obviously electricity is still a mystery to most italians too, so it has the occasional spell of odd lights not working now and again, or just doing this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UsGHAGGu6Lk&feature=g-upl&context=G2c8695eAUAAAAAAADAA

[SubaruBrat]

The auto transport arrived at my house on Monday with the 355F1, and when the driver tried to raise the ramp the lift motor and gearbox failed. So since Monday my car has been trapped on the truck while parts have been ordered and work done to repair the transport so that the car can be unloaded. They say that the final parts will be in today (Friday) and I will finally get my car, this has been a very, very, long week.

[random_dave]

Was the transporter made in italy too? ;)

[SubaruBrat]

Iowa

[SubaruBrat]

I have been doing some work on the Ferrari over the last few weeks;

Carbon fiber door sills;

http://ferrarichat.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=1479309&stc=1&d=1330792068



Clear corners;

http://ferrarichat.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=1479310&stc=1&d=1330792068



Hill footrest and a gps/bluetooth/media flip up.

http://ferrarichat.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=1479312&stc=1&d=1330792068


And carbon fiber engine trim.

http://ferrarichat.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=1479657&stc=1&d=1330833750

[miner2049er]

Have to be signed in to those forums for the links to work.

[random_dave]

I'm using it as a way to exercise my imagination, although Scotts 'baby' now has wings and a jet engine, woooooooosh!

[miner2049er]

In my imagination his car is yellow.

[SubaruBrat]

It is Titanium Grigiot, and I did upload pics to our forum and linked them but it seems to be hit or miss, and we own this SOB> Will try again...

My 355 at the Spring Thaw Ferrari Event mine is the silver one in front.

http://retrogamingroundup.com/images/misc/3551.JPG

[Dhalamar]

I don't care if my car is sexy. Given the job that I do, I need reliability and gas mileage, and considering I paid $1,600 for this car it's lived up to that so far and has been worth every penny considering it has a bad O2 sensor (don't know if I spelled that right. I'm not a car guy) that causes it to idle a little funky and some cosmetic problems. :)

http://wastedseconds.com/images/civic.jpg

Mine's obviously the white one.

I'm too lazy to upload the pic I took of the odometer... but it hit 300,000 miles recently and still runs beautifully. kthx

[SubaruBrat]

Did you get your 02 sensor fixed?

[Dhalamar]

Did you get your 02 sensor fixed?

Nope. Not yet. lol

[SubaruBrat]

I assume you have a check engine light on? If you can get the code read at any AutoZone and let me know what it is I can tell you which sensor to get and the best price. It is really, really easy to install yourself. There are only two in your car, one before the catalytic converter and one after. If it is the one before then it can impact mileage and performance, if it is the one after the cat then it does nothing but monitor how well the cat is working. The downstream one can be dead forever and your check engine light on with no ill effects.

[focusrs]

615

During a trip to Italy, I ran across this restuarant close to the Duomo in downtown Milan that at a Ferrari Theme. Outside was parked this beauty that I got to drive!!!

[Flare]

Mr. Bean would have absolutely hated this car that I found today while playing L.A. Noire.
http://i.imgur.com/31ZOD.jpg

[Madstedotcom]

Hi Guys thought I'd throw in my old car to the mix Lancia Delta HF Turbo, pic is not mine but very similar. Mine was chipped with larger Exhaust and was very much a sleeper car as most people wouldn't have a clue what it was. Now if only I get my father to give me his Lancia Delta Integrale Evo 1 it would be good times. Currently being sensible and rocking a Ford Fiesta TDCi, 50mpg and £30 annual road tax is not to be sniffed at. So having my fun in 1.32 scale got loads of modded slot cars to race at local slot car club.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/5/51/Lancia_Delta_HF_turbo_001.JPG

[Matt Den.aris]

http://www.jacksonsmodels.co.uk/images/_lib/corgi-va11003-ford-escort-mkiii-xr3i-dorset-police-143-scale-3008722-0-1258479297000.jpg


I want! My 2nd car was a Mk3 XR3i with those very alloys. It soon had a completely rehashed front end, twice, but still went well for a 1.6.

[Flare]

I like watching this video of a BMW 850 CSi driving at 300 Km/h on the autobahn.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VpvrRB79koU

[focusrs]

716

[SubaruBrat]

Just bought it today, 2006 Baja Sport (last year they made them). Going to do a lift and bigger tires, and maybe an STi engine swap.

http://www.gamegavel.com/forum/www.retrogamingroundup.com/images//Scott/BAJA.JPGhttp://www.retrogamingroundup.com/images//Scott/BAJA.JPG

[miner2049er]

Hoodlum!

[Atarifever]

Hey, car people, I figured I'd mention there's an international road race/rally here in Newfoundland every year. It's a several day race on roads through a bunch of towns (the towns close the roads for the race). I believe it's open entry, so if anyone has always wanted to be in European style road rally, and wanted to do that in the most beautiful place in the world, you should look into the Targa Newfoundland. The stage down my street is later this afternoon. I'll get pictures.

Here's a video on it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gs6TPbwvi0&feature=related

[Atarifever]

Hey, I don't know if any of these cars are particularly nice, but I uploaded some pictures to Flickr from the Targa Newfoundland stage here yesterday:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/atarifever/sets/72157631526047336/

[random_dave]

I think we may have a bit of a wage gap at our office
http://87.194.142.100/apps/files_sharing/get.php?token=bf7fa0a38cf3b3465c17813aa3de889774cf b6e7

[SubaruBrat]

Nice!

[Flare]

Those disability benefits are off the charts there...

[Flare]

Hey y'all, remember that Toyota RAV4 I leased in 2010?

I traded it in last weekend and got a new 2012 Dodge Journey Crew. The 2013 models were in and they were practically giving these away, being the end of the year and all. Got a sweet deal, and the "Crew" trim is insane. Fully loaded.

http://i.imgur.com/329fc.jpg

http://www.dodge.com/en/2013/journey/crew/

[SubaruBrat]

Rules for owning Italian cars, damn they are accurate too.

1) THE LAW OF PLEASING DESIGN WHERE IT REALLY DOESN'T MATTER
"The inside of cam covers or other relatively innocuous areas, shall
be laced with buttresses, cross-bracing and all manner of esoteric
stiffness-with-lightness design, while something like connecting rods
shall self-destruct at redline plus 1.0 rpm due to a basic lack of
strength." An example of this Law is the stunningly beautiful
Lamborghini or Ferrari V-12's of the late '60's. They were famous for
wearing out all four camshafts in 10,000 miles or less. The cam's
metal appeared to be recycled coat hangers, which coincidentally are
still in short supply in Italy.


2) THE LAW OF NON-FUNCTIONAL APPARATUS
"All Italian Sports Cars, regardless of age, shall have at least one
system or component which does not work, and cannot be repaired. Such
a part shall never be mentioned in the Official Shop Manual, although
there may be an out-of-focus picture shown." It goes without saying
that such parts should never under any circumstances be removed, lest
the natural balance of the car be upset.


3)THE LAW OF ELECTRICAL CHAOS
"All Italian Sports Cars shall be wired at the Factory by a
cross-eyed, color-blind worker, using whatever supplies are within
reach. All wires shall change color-code at least once between energy
source and component. all grounds shall be partially insulated." This
tends to guarantee that the owner of such vehicles will eventually be
intimately familiar with its electrical system, since he will need to
trace out each wire, then rewrite his Official Schematic, which will
differ from all others in at least one area.


4)THE LAW OF PERSONAL ABUSE
"The more an Italian auto breaks down, the more endearing it becomes
to its increasingly irrational owner." For example, you purchase an
Italian Sports car, for all the money you ever hoped to earn, and
receive a ticket for air pollution on the way home from the dealer due
to the vast clouds of smoke that follow you. Several return trips to
said dealer, accompanied by your rapidly dwindling cash reserves,
cures the smoking. But now, the engine sounds like a food processor
full of ball-bearings. After replacing every component in the car,
including the radio speakers, the noise vanishes and is replaced by an
odor reminiscent of a major fire in a goat-hair mattress factory. You
still keep trying, God help you.


5)THE LAW OF UNAVAILABLE PARTS
"All parts of an Italian sports car shall be made of a material that
is available in inverse proportion to its operating half-life." Thus,
the speedometer hold-down screws are made of grade 8 cold rolled
steel, while the valves are of fabricated Unobtanium, made only at
midnight by an old man with a pointy hat covered with moons and stars.
Such parts will be backordered during the design phase of the car, and
will remain so forever. Bribes, pleading and threats will be ignored.


6)THE LAW OF CRYPTIC INSTRUCTIONS
"Any official publications dealing with repair, maintenance or
operations of an Italian sports car, shall be written such that every
fourth word is incomprehensible to the average American. In the event
that a random sentence is understandable, its information shall be
wrong." This is also known as flat-tire English, where a sentence
flows along nicely, then-Kaboom!